There is a GIANT lizard under my couch. Well, I'm not sure if he's (it most definitely is a male) under the couch anymore, but he's in the house.
Last night, Cowboy H and I sat down on the NEW couch to eat dinner on the NEW tv trays. When I sat down, I pushed the ottoman/coffee table out from the couch a little bit.
Cowboy H says, "Look at that" and casually motions towards the base of the ottoman.
And there, sticking out from under, was the tail and back-end of a GIANT lizard. I mean, this sucker is HUGE. I have never seen a lizard that big before. At least, not a normal backyard lizard.
The sucker must have heard us talking about him, cause he quickly pulled his hinney under the ottoman and out of sight. Hank caught on, and spent our entire dinner-time circling the ottoman with his nose glued to the ground. At one point, he (Hank) darted from the ottoman to the back of the couch and stayed there sniffing loudly, which is how I can to the conclusion that the lizard is under my couch.
So, before bed, I had a little talk with all the kitties (well, not Olivia because she's worthless for catching anything), letting them know I excepted a big ole GIANT DEAD lizard in the middle of the kitchen floor the next morning.
But, alas, there was no DEAD lizard. Which means, there is a still very much alive GIANT lizard under my couch.
And I have THREE pretty much worthless cats.